Why the Kashmir issue is like a Saas-Bahu Serial

Kashmir situation is becoming worse every day, and it’s quite difficult to balance the loyalty one feels for his nation, and the illogical state of affairs we have landed into.jkroad

Let’s forget for the moment, Maharaja Hari Singh, Pandit Nehru, Sardar Patel, India Gandhi, Narendra Modi etc various agreements we had with different leaders from Sheikh Abdullah to Bhutto.  All these are important from legal and political perspective, but not part of this discussion.

But in 2016, what’s important is the human beings out in Kashmir. Both the army men and the inhabitants of the valley.

Let’s accept certain facts. The percentages quoted may not be accurate to the last digit.

  1. About 97 percent of the valley, and about 70 percent of Kashmiris are  Muslims.
  2. At least 90 percent of them don’t identify as Indians. They are not willing to accept the merger with India.  That’s at least 8 million of them there.
  3. Rest of us, including some extreme left heart bleeding liberals are not able to understand their logic for the following reasons. This includes me too. I have been speaking with Kashmiris I know, and I certainly don’t get it. Some of my reasons are why they should stay with India, and I really want someone to tell me what would be counter arguments.
    a) Kashmir cannot remain independent between India and Pakistan
    b) Azaad Kashmir is a misnomer. There’s no Azaadi in POK.
    c) The soft sufism Islam practiced by majority of Kashmiris will invite attacks from Sunni radicals once merged.
    d) Pakistan is a failed state, and you will be driven to penury. India is a richer country, and opportunities are better for everyone.

We as a nation has an express interest in Kashmir. And I absolutely share it. I simply don’t want us to give up on Kashmir.

If you can suppress your jingoistic feelings inside for some time and think logically, you will see that our interest in Kashmir is limited to the real estate piece called Kashmir. Our interest is really not in the people residing in that real estate, what they think, what they want, what they say or where do they want to go.

To understand and illustrate this better, we need to understand Kashmir problem and compare it to a typical Indian marriage. The Kind of marriages seen in Indian TV serials.

So we have 9 constituents to this anology, and I am borrowing them from the Saas Bahu Serials.

  1. The Righteous husband –India represented by Indians living outside Kashmir (and not India the country)
  2. The Unhappy Wife — Kashmiris(Muslim Kashmiris) who want Azaadi.
  3.  The Dowry — Kashmir, the real estate awarded to India by wife’s father Raja Hari Singh.
  4.  The Wedding — That took place in October 1947. It so happened that the wife was probably more acceptable to the marriage then.
  5. The Jealous Suitor who is still eyeing the wife and the dowry a.k.a The Villain — Pakistan
  6.  Relatives of Husband and Wife — Indian Media, the so-called Nationalists, the Sanghis, the Bhakts, AAPtards, seculars and pseudo-seculars etc.
  7. Members of Society — NGOs, International Media, UN representatives and other countries.
  8.  The Vamp — Barkha Dutt, Sagarika Ghose and the bleeding seculars ( Hey that includes me too)
  9. The Inter Religion Marriage — Initially both husband and wife were secular, suddenly husband is a Hindu and wife is Muslim.


The Plot of the Serial, Misogynist like all Indian serials.

  1. Well, the wife unfortunately is not willing to listen to any reason, like many wives we have heard of. The husband is doling out many presents, is desperately wooing her. India is spending more on Kashmir than on a populous state like Bihar which has nearly 10 times the population.
  2. Yet wife is not ready to fall back in line, accept the husband and get along with the marriage. In fact wife says she hates the husband.
  3. Relatives who are sensible keep telling the wife. Look how nice the husband is. He is taking care of you very well, he is a such a nice guy. He is so handsome compared to the wily suitor, Pakistan. Some of the neighbors are not willing to get involved because they think wife seperated is not a great idea.
  4. They also tell the wife to adjust and continue with the relationship, we cannot afford the breakup.
  5. Since wife is not listening and is actually resorting to violence with the support of the Villain, husband is using force. Yes, we have 700,000 security men to control a population of about 8.8 million Kashmiris who are seeking independence.
  6. Now the wife is insisting on Talaq even more, she is complaining that the husband is beating her up, and is claiming domestic abuse.
  7. Many members of the society agrees with her, they are whispering. Worse, some relatives are siding with her and a few of them are making fun of the husband. Husband is hoping mad.
  8. Some relatives are telling the husband f*&^ with the wife, let’s ship her to her suitor, but let’s keep the dowry. Whatever happens we cannot  give up the dowry.
  9. Wife is caught in two minds, if a Talaq takes place. One half of her mind she wants to remain independent, and another half of her mind wants to marry the old suitor.
  10. But India  like any possessive husband will not let off this 69 year old bride away. And there are several reasons, both legal and political. India does have rights over Kashmir, but then that should not be the only reason, when there’s no love between the husband and wife.
  11. Fact remains husband’s real interest is dowry, he does not care about the wife, and we will always use the tragic story of Kashmiri Pundits, and the attacks on Indian army to justify the marriage.
  12. Husband unfortunately cannot go to court. Unlike marriages where you can have courts to decide on issues, we cannot even have any third party  intervention. UN, USA, and China which could be potential mediators which Pakistan might insist on and they will ask for a plebiscite or a referendum, and we cannot afford a plebiscite. That’s just the first step to a real divorce, and we will need to return the dowry.

Moral of the story: If husband need to keep the dowry, then start loving the wife, and not the dowry. Stop beating the wife, and give her a lot more independence. Start trusting her. She may still demand a divorce. But we need to try keeping her with us, and the dowry too.

Well, it’s all easy to say, right! That’s the exact problem we have with Kashmir.

Now watch this video and song….

Categories: Renegade Politics | Leave a comment

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